Seconds after Secretary of State Hillary Clinton departed for Nairobi Kenya on a diplomatic mission, her husband, former President Bill Clinton (center) chartered a private plane and took off for North Korea on what the White House described as a personal mission.

Laura Ling (L) and Euna Lee (R), reporters for Al Gore's Current TV, were detained by North Korea along the border with China in March. Accused of illegally entering the country and engaging in "hostile acts", the pair was sentenced to 12 years' hard labor in June.

Clinton’s mission to N. Korea resulted in pardoning of the pair of babes, both of whom were described by State Television as being extremely grateful to the former president. The trio was last seen smiling as the boarded the private plane.
EDITOR’S NOTE: The photo included with this article was edited in Photoshop to remove “red-eye” and to make other minor changes. It is the belief of the editorial staff that the intent or content of the photograph has not been otherwise altered.

Pointing out that she is a fighter, not a quitter, Sarah Palin quit yesterday. Stating that she must leave office to avoid being a lame duck, thus saving the people of Alaska the nonsense of numerous ethics violations hearings. Apparently, not knowing that she did not meet any of the four criteria to be a lame duck,

1. having lost a re-election bid
2. choosing not to seek another term at the expiration of the current term
3. a term limit which keeps the official from running for that particular office again
4. the abolishment of the office, which must nonetheless be served out until the end of the official's term

In a selfless act of individual heroism, Rolf Rykken, friend of the Nuclear Family Times, has generously volunteered to donate a kidney to an anonymous individual in the Nuclear Family Times Kidney Drive. With the help of organ broker Levy Izhak Rosenbaum of Brooklyn, the Nuclear Family Times was able to turn a profit which exceeded last year’s entire Google Ad-Sense revenues. For more information about donating your kidney(s), lung(s), heart, or hearts, in the case of Time Lords, use this email link. If you would rather be selfish, click on the google adds on this page.

Gidget the Chihuahua, the bug-eyed, big-eared star of 1990s Taco Bell commercials who was a diva on and off the screen, has died. She was 15. Gidget suffered a massive stroke late Tuesday night at her trainer's home in Santa Clarita and had to be euthanized, said Karin McElhatton, owner of Studio Animal Services in Castaic, which owned the dog.

Although she was hard of hearing, Gidget was otherwise in good health up to the day of her death, eating well and playing with her favorite squeaky toys at the home of trainer Sue Chipperton, McElhatton said. "She was retired. She lived like a queen, very pampered," McElhatton said.

Gidget was found at a kennel and wasn't show quality, McElhatton said; she had an undershot jaw and huge ears. But Gidget knew she was a star, McElhatton said. "She was a prima donna, basically. She absolutely knew when she was on camera," McElhatton said.

In a 1997 Taco Bell television commercial, Gidget was seen as a male dog who, through the magic of special effects and a voice actor, proclaims in a richly accented voice: "Yo quiero Taco Bell" _ Spanish for "I want Taco Bell." Viewers were charmed. What was supposed to be a single ad became a campaign that ran from 1997 to 2000. The ads made the Taco Bell mascot wildly popular, although they provoked criticism from activists who accused them of promoting Hispanic stereotypes.

While other Chihuahuas had bit parts, McElhatton said it was Gidget who got the closeups and the quips (Carlos Alazraqui was the voice). Gidget traveled first-class, opened up the New York Stock Exchange and made an appearance at Madison Square Garden, McElhatton said. In later years, she did other acting work, appearing in a 2002 commercial for the insurance company GEICO and in the 2003 movie "Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde."

She remained the object of affection after her retirement, going on hikes and beach visits with her trainer. She aged gracefully, and liked nothing more than to snooze in the sun. "She was like a little old lady. She'd kind of gotten smaller," McElhatton said. Gidget will be cremated, McElhatton said. Her owners had not decided on a final disposition of her remains. Taco Bell Corp. said in a statement Gidget would be missed by many. "Our deepest sympathies go out to her owners and fans," the company said. (THE ASSOCIATED PRESS CONTRIBUTED TO THIS ARTICLE.)

Walter Cronkite, an iconic CBS News journalist who defined the role of anchorman for a generation of television viewers, died Friday at the age of 92, his family said.

Mr. Cronkite anchored the “CBS Evening News” from 1962 to 1981, at a time when television became the dominant medium of the United States. He figuratively held the hand of the American public during the civil-rights movement, the space race, the Vietnam war and the impeachment of Richard Nixon. During his tenure, network newscasts were expanded to 30 minutes from 15.

Today G8 leaders agreed to a pact to limit global warming to 2 degrees Celsius with no real measures as to how to achieve the goal. Buttttttt... 2 degrees Celsius is equal to 35.6 degrees Fahrenheit. That means that summers in Dover would be like 140 degrees! We’re doomed!

South Carolina second-term Governor, Mark Sanford, Chair of the Republican Governor’s Association, reported to be a leading GOP contender for the 2012 Presidential nomination, and famous for his championing “family values”, and for condemning fellow Republicans who are homosexual or have extra marital affairs, today made a rambling, tearful confession of his own infidelities. While he was alleged to have been hiking the Appalachian Trail, he was in fact in Argentina visiting his mistress. Sweet!

I have three points that I’d like to interject at this point which have been overlooked entirely by other media outlets.

1 The weather this past week has been great, perfect for hiking and Mark Sanford has been in Buenos Aires where it has been wet and between 4 and 9 degrees Celsius. Hasn’t he suffered enough?

2 He missed the Father’s Day 5K in Rehoboth Beach and no one picked up his T-shirt.

3 The guy is a bit of a hypocrite, not only because he champions “family values” but he has been publicly critical of his Republican colleagues who have “strayed” and in the case of toe tapper, Larry Craig, Mark Sanford was actually angry and totally missed the humor.

It’s this last point that guarantees his political survival. Now, because his wife was not at his side during his apology, he may have to do a stint in rehab from which he will emerge with his faith in Christ, stronger than ever. As for the hypocrisy, Barack Obama smokes but championed anti-smoking legislation. And no one ever got cancer from second-hand adultery.

S.C. Governor, Mark Sanford, holding a chart illustrating the decreasing frequency of his marital infidelities.